Try a Cliché

flickr.com

A cliché is an overused expression or an idea of just about anything. It can also be a person or character whose behavior is predictable or superficial. Cliché’s surrounds us, is everywhere and in almost everything! But what the big fuss?

I cut cliché’s out my life, period. It robs me from authenticity. It is bland and freezes my brain as it lacks intellectual conversation and content. It is stagnant and smells. I am sorry, I had a bad experience with cliché’s and it does not serve me or my future!

The best way to get rid of cliché’s is being more informative, creative and descriptive. When you experience the same old drama of cliché’s – such as saying: ‘’I think it was love at first sight!’….instead rather ask yourself: ‘what made me feel that way when I was with my lover or when I think of my lover…..’ Then name those feelings and go into detail how you felt. You will get a better understanding of the love you have within yourself and most of the time, that love is not from the person you felt it from. That love is within you and belongs to you!

We tend to always think ‘from the outside’. Our outer conditions determine our mood and happiness depend on the weather for example….but little do we know if we can create an awareness of what is going on inside of us and acknowledge it, we will notice the immense love we have within ourselves, for ourselves! And we definitely don’t need the weather to make our day or any lover to say the least!

Anyway, this is me trying to share my experience of trying out cliché’s. Next time you hear anyone mentioning cliché’s do yourself a favor and set an example! 😉

Feelings Follow Behaviour

What kind of life do you want..? You have this choice, everyone does. No matter how rich or poor, we all have this choice.
When we were babies our parents/surrogates nurtured and loved us and this was the birth of our emotions. Growing up as fearless toddlers expressing ourselves freely and publicly. We were told to behave in certain ways, and sometimes even slapped or scolded if we disobeyed. We learned our parents/surrogates’ emotional patterns, whether positive or negative and made our way into this world: ‘beautifully conditioned by our parents.’
We should understand that our parents/surrogates taught us what they knew and showed us their own conditioned experiences. They did not know better and continued these inherited patterns subconsciously. Whether we told ourselves we will be like thembetter than them or completely different to them, the truth is these learned emotional behaviours control us like windup wooden dolls. Unless we learn our own new emotional behavioural patterns, we will never be free.
How do we learn new behaviour?
By understanding these old behavioural patterns we then have the awareness of how to get rid of them. Once we are rid of them, we can then learn new ones by creating new behavioural patterns. Emotions and feelings follow behaviour which follow results.
Check out what life you want to live, create that life by being conscious and aware of your behaviour and in touch with your own feelings and emotions. You can attend courses that deal with these kind of issues such as the Hoffman Process that I highly recommend and completed myself: www.hoffmanprocess.co.uk

It Is Better To Practice A Little Than Talk A Lot

Getting your message across can sometimes be hard. The trick is to talk out of experience and to communicate the most important part of that specific experience.

People stop listening at some point in conversation. We all do. It is human nature to lose concentration by the second or third paragraph unless the story is either super exciting, gory or filled with gossipy bits. By the way, stay away from gossip…it reeks of bad karma for both the listener and talker. People engage in gossip usually to feel superior to others. By knocking down others, the theory is that one can boost one’s own self-image. Saying no to gossip is protecting yourself and the other from planting negative karma seeds. So please stop it.

Here is how you can practice right speech and get people to listen to you: 

1. Approach others with confidence, hold that head up! 

2. Briefly introduce yourself  and look people in the eye. Remember you have the right to be here!

3. Get your point across!

Talk about something you are passionate about and then ask questions. This draws attention and allows for immediate interaction. Use your eyes and don’t talk about things you have just heard or read briefly. You will look a fool if you are trying to impress with your vague knowledge and your ego will standout and people will stay away and loose respect.

If you don’t have much experience, then practice asking questions. This supports you in obtaining lots of information, and creates a life of excitement and interest. Saying yes all the time, means your ‘yes’ has no value. What really works for me is when somebody is right or when it resonates with me. I never say: ”You are right.” Instead I say: ” I agree.” It is much more empowering for both of us and strengthens my personal choices.

Enjoy your speech as a tool to help others and yourself. It is a gift to express, to change, to converse and to share. Being proud of your talk means you are proud of being you!

The Weekend: TGIF

Waking up this morning to the sound of my little baby girl’s cooing and aaah-ing, I quickly left the warm covers for yet another day of duty-calling. I jumped up and then stopped…’hey, thank god it’s Friday!’ I displayed a huge smile of satisfaction and made my way into the ‘last’ day of slavery, responsibility and check lists!

 The weekend is simply two wonderful days filled with possibility! 

During the week, we chat about our weekend plans and arrange it accordingly. Finally it arrives and we dive into the freedom: we get ourselves all busy at home, we scurry to our pretty malls, finding ourselves in long queued banks, we enjoy our noisy restaurants and we join the locals at the latest event in town. We must not miss anything! We’ll enjoy Saturday brunch at our favorite Cafe’s with our dearest friends and we feel that life is such a blessing on lazy Saturday afternoons. Evenings we either make our way to the dance floor, we laugh and watch movies till late until its time for those ‘explicit shows’ on telly which normally upsets us or not.

We have that second cup of coffee in bed on Sunday mornings, chatting on our smartphones whilst being oh so conscious of distant church bells ringing and wondering who is in church and wearing what. We make our way to meet family and friends for the usual and may I add, delicious Sunday lunch…..And then reality checks in…that little voice usually around 4 to 6pm: a subtle reminder of our Monday morning preparation. Obliviously we get our formal act together and diligently return to our ‘good-old’ routine of responsibilities and deadlines! Yayyy!!

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Ok, I exaggerated a little in my story, but I hope you get my picture. Personally I believe it’s not a matter of the amount of days within a weekend, but what I do with those days. I see it as a gift from the ‘universe’ where I live, share, enjoy and express myself in every moment of this wonderful freedom called Weekend End…bearing always in mind that it could’ve been worse…;-)

A Wedding Cake in the Middle of the Road!

source*bridesofnorthtexas.com

Someone made a mistake and it could be that she’ll regret it for the rest of her life. What to do…run away and disappear….a definite no go…and there is no time! Someone realised it was too late and her life is in fact, over. What about the wedding…what about the people…what about the parents-in-law! Oh my hat, what about the cake…what have I done!

It is sad when you throw away food. We live in a world where poverty prevails and food scarcity is one of our biggest problems, with over 40 countries struggling worldwide. Is there anything that we can do to help? We can support Malawi’s farmers to obtain fertiliser and high-yield seeds, whose harvest doubled after only one year. The U.S. and Europe should abandon their policies of subsidising food conversion into biofuels. And lastly to weatherproof the world’s crops as soon and as effectively as possible such as a rainwater reservoir like a simple pond to support crops. These are just examples from Africa, but do check your local communities what you can do.

Ok, back to the wedding cake…Sometimes we make choices to please others. We subconsciously do so to feel loved and appreciation. When we finally ‘wake up’ to the mess we’ve made, it is often too late. We feel stuck with our choices to please and we turn into these sour-little-tunnel-view-citizens.

Why do we put ourselves last to please others, only to disappoint the most important person in the world…you!

Truth is, as humans we can only make decisions out of experience or out of somebody else’s experience (advice). Allowing ourselves to have any kind of experience creates the necessary wisdom and information that eventually leads to our decisions in life. Makes sense? 😉

Stand By You

Standing by someone is beautiful and part of humanity. We support one another out of love and respect. We are there for our friends and partners in good times and in bad times. No matter what happens, we want to stand by our loved ones. Right?

What does it mean to be there for someone? It means offering your loving support to someone else without expecting anything in return. This is possible if you have learned to love yourself, unconditionally.

Here’s why: Anything you offer in the world, must live within yourself first. Otherwise you cannot give to the ‘outer’. You might think you can but then its based on a need for yourself. A need that you subconsciously feel the ‘outer’ should fulfill through your own expectation. At the end, you will be the disappointed one.

Loving yourself enough not to give your own power away when standing by someone means allowing others to freely express themselves, without judgement. A good way is to detach yourself from the results of your needs and others with 100% awareness and to listen to yourself and others. Offer your advice only when asked. Do so entirely without expecting anything in return from any friendship.

Practice this with your children, family members, friends, etc 🙂 Oh and do listen to this wonderful song that inspired me to write this blog!  I’ll Stand by You by the Pretenders ://www.youtube.com/watch?v=maAyfcO-X3k